Las Vegas

Had a great week behind the bar, made lots of tips, so I decided to go to Las Vegas. There's no better place to go with a pocket full of cash than Vegas- Right.  So me and the girlfriend arrive in Vegas about 7pm on Saturday night- ready to party.  I just left Manhattan, NYC- party central; but really we are amateurs compared to Vegas. They put on one hell of a show- at least for three days anyway. Anybody that has been to Las Vegas understands.  Kinda like- Amsterdam.

What a sight to see, the Vegas strip- but it kinda reminds me of New York City. The Taxi drivers from Brooklyn and the first thing he says is, "you know, (In a big brooklyn accent) forgettaboutit, Vegas is running out of water, so they are going to recycle the toilet water". Now I have two problems with that, I say, "number one; and number two"?

Vegas is all smoke and mirrors, the devil's delight, a middle finger to God with all his trees, rocks and little bunny rabbits, all that Disney shite. But you know what, its fantastic, for three days anyway, as I said before. 

Well we find ourselves in the New York, New York Hotel, even though we have just left New York, New York. Walking through the Greenwich Village part of the Hotel, not missing the pigeons and the homosexuals, just kidding Steve.

We have a great time at the MGM Grand Hotel pool in the day time and lose all our money at night time.
We actually met Howie Mandel, you know from the TV show, Deal or No Deal.  I told him that they are actually doing the same show in Africa called, Meal or No Meal, he laughed and walked away.

Speaking of Africa, did you hear that Bono is pleading with the Africans to help the starving Irish!!

I love the slogan they have for Las Vegas, we all know it, "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas".  I say, what happens in Vegas you should tell the whole fuckin world, tell everyone because its a mad, brilliant place. But, what happens in the back woods of a West Virginia farm house, or a wee shed in Connemara, Galway, Ireland- now that should stay there.

The MGM Grand Hotel actually has a swim up poker table.  That's one of the many things that makes Vegas "awesome".  So that means you don't have to leave the game to go to the bathroom.  Remember, the Vegas slogan, "What happens in a Vegas pool: stays in a Vegas pool".

Cheers for now and please tip your bartender, especially this broke arse one, remember, I just got back from Vegas- thanks

Happy New Year To All

Well New Years Eve was quite a night at the bar, crazy busy but as usual a lot of fun. Thanks to all who came out. A special thanks to all my friends and family who made it extra special, I really enjoyed our champagne toast at midnight, cheers and have a fun and healthy 2011.

One person actually gave me a twenty dollar bill when I asked him for ID.  I'm like, you don't look anything like Andrew Jackson, but you could look like Franklin-check your money later.

These prostitutes come into the bar late, I've know them for many years now- nice girls.  My partner at the bar asks me, " Do they have ID,", I say, " prostitute don't carry Id, they usually carry VD".

Another guy came in and his breath nearly knocked me over, it came straight from Satan's arse.  I said, how about you brush your teeth next year, now that's a new years resolution.

I just read an article in the New York Times newspaper on the dangers of drinking alcohol.  That's it, my new years resolution is to- stop reading.

This rabbi came in the bar with a frog on his shoulder, I said to him; "where did you get that," and the frog said, "Brooklyn there's fuckin loads of them".

People ask me to take a picture of them all the time at the bar, especially during the holidays, and I don't mind at all. What I do mind is when they say, "the button of the camera is right there on the top right corner", oh really, no shit Sherlock, its only been there for, like ever, thanks for the heads up-dip shit.

So here's to a great New Year and please remember, always tip your bartender.