If you all didn't know by my blogger name "newyorkcitybartender", I am actually a bartender in New York City, the big apple. Jimmy Buffet in the garden tonight, great night lots of fun. I never made so many Margarita's as I did tonight, those parrot heads sure like their margarita's on the rocks, straight up, with salt, either way they lapped them up, it was worth the hassle as the tips were good at the end of the night-5am. There an older crowd so they are all pretty well behaved except for this french lad, what an arrogant little shit. I don't want to pick on the french with the old stereotype but it seems some of them think they are so above everyone else and this guy was tiny. Well pal no wonder you have never won a war when you name your cities Toulouse. Talk about a napoleon complex he was so short that when I asked him for his I.D, in the photo you could see his feet. I said to him what was the last women you were inside- the statue of liberty.
I hate these people who always come up to me and say where are you from, I tell them I'm from Ireland and they say I'd love to go there, well what the fuck are you waiting for, there's 10 flight a day mate, its easier to go to Ireland than to get to the upper east side from the west side. Just go to the airport and go, by the time this stupid, boring conversation is over you will be there. I have one guy that comes in maybe twice a week for the last few years and every time he comes in he says I'd love to go, what the fuck are you waiting for, get in a taxi, go to the airport, buy a ticket and you will be there in no time and stop telling me how much you want to go, you prick.
Then other people come to me and say, my friend was in Ireland last week, do you think I give a shit, then they say to me, with that accent you must get laid all the time in New York, its kind off a back handed compliment, I say, well I wasn't exactly a virgin in Ireland.
Thanks I feel better now. See you later now go down to your local watering hole and have yourself a margarita- its on me.
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3 comments:
Should you be considering leaving bartending for the comedy circuit, as the saying goes, "Don't give up your day job."
Or, perhaps in your case,night job. :) Just joking Mr. Bartender. I am actually looking forward to the blog as I am on the wagon and won't be able to experience those precious moments with the crew at Happy Hour.
What is your LEAST favorite song on the jukebox??
Least fav song, by the verve- drugs don't work
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