Its hot today in the city, I'm sweating like R Kelly at a girl scout meeting, like an Israeli bus driver, like a priest at a boy scout meeting . They say its all that Global warming stuff- who knows? I heard the actor Vin Diesel in support of Global Warming has changed his name from Vin Diesel to Vin Ethanol- well done Vin, it all helps.
At least the homeless people in New York City are happy with the longer warmer months. I actually only date homeless people because when the date is over you can drop them off anywhere.
Man comes into the bar tonight and sits by the window at the end of the bar, its basically just off eight avenue- "Hells Kitchen". Well I notice that every time a truck goes by the window that he starts shaking uncontrollably, and when you can't hear the truck anymore he stops shaking. So I ask this man, "why every time a truck goes by, do you start shaking", he says "well, honestly, its because (Stopping as if he's changing gears in his own truck) my wife ran off with a truck driver; and every time I hear a truck; I think he's bringing her back"!!
You can't make that up- brilliant.
Remember tip your bartender!!