I Swear You Can't Make This Shit Up.

I was telling these people in the bar one day how in Ireland the fish particularly the salmon are jumping out of the water. There is actually one place in County Kerry where if you lean over this bridge as the salmon are coming up the river, you can actually grab them out of the air, as they jump out of the water. So these two Polish guys overhear my conversation and they tell me they are actually stopping off in Ireland on there way to Poland next week, and they will go and try to catch some Salmon. I tell them exactly where this place is in Kerry. They leave and tell me they will be back in the bar in a few weeks and will tell me what happened.
So sure enough a few weeks go by and these two Polish guys come back into the bar. Here's their story, its priceless.
So we get to County Kerry in Ireland and we locate the bridge where the salmon are supposed to be. So I lean over the bridge while from friend holds my feet so I can get down low. So after about an hour my friend starts screaming and shouting, "Pull me up, pull me up", so I say to him, "Did you get a Salmon", "No " he says, " There's a train coming".
I swear you can't make this shit up.

People say to me all the time, "Oh with that accent you must get laid all the time", by the way you might have a point but I was not exactly a virgin when I came to New York. So in a way its not a compliment, what their actually saying is, if you didn't have an accent you wouldn't get laid you ugly fucker. Thanks people.
By the way I had a pop tart today, my doctor told me I have to eat more fruit- feeling Great.
Cheers for now and don't forget to tip your Bartender!!!